"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy..." John 10:10. Satan comes to steal our joy. He wants us to fail, he wants us to quit.
..."I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10. God wants us to have joy!
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his might power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." Ephesians 6:10-11. God wants us to have victory; more than we do.
Some day I am going to learn to trust in God completely. Someday I am going to overcome the fear of the different and unknown.
It has been a rough week. Sleep was a great desire but a distant dream. You learn just how important sleep is when you can't find enough of it. Emotions were high, the body was weak, rational thinking lost. Satan had the perfect conditions to weasel his way in and do his job; steal my joy. And I let him. I quit praying my prayer challenge prayer, I quit looking for God's precious gifts, I ignored God's truths and focused on and believed in Satan's lies. I wallowed in that depressive state that I hate so much because it has a comfortable familiarity to it; it just seems the easier route. I desired pity, craved encouragement from others, but, like always, I feared being a burden, so I worked hard at trying to avoid people. I withdrew and felt bitter about it. I felt guilt and shame because of my weak behavior.
I finally reached a point on Monday where I desired some time away from the drama; I wanted to spend some time with God. I gathered up my bible and journal and I walked into our quiet, empty church, went straight to the sanctuary and spent 2 solid hours with God. At first I just did some venting and crying. I expressed my angers, doubts, fears and frustrations. I did some apologizing and then I started to ask questions. What I wrote in my Journal: "Why do I doubt you? Why so much fear and lack of trust? I do believe you're there - deep down, I do. I have felt you. I have felt you work in my life. You have made changes in me. So why is my heart weak? Why does it take so little to pull me down? Is it the scars on my heart or is that just an excuse? Why do I fight you and push you away? What am I so afraid of? What!? Why is there so much need in me? Why do I feel like you can't fill it?"
Then I heard, "Open your Bible." So I did.
Psalm 119:62; "...at midnight I rise to give you thanks.
Eucharisteo. Gift list. It was working. Each gift lifted my spirit. Then I quit. I quit seeking "your face with all my heart" (v58). I quit on you even though you don't quit on me. I commit suicide.
I use to think of the word suicide as only meaning the taking of one's own life. But I learned while listening to my pastor's sermon on Sunday that suicide can have another meaning, too. The definition in Dictionary.com that does not apply to physical death is; Destruction of one's own interests or prospects. Prospects: The outlook for the future. Anticipation, expectation; a looking forward. A mental view or survey, as of a subject or situation.
When I stop looking for Jesus, when I quit trusting and leaning on him, I am committing suicide. Jesus is life; eternal life. The opposite of Jesus is death; spiritual, emotional, and physical death.
Verses 77, 80, 92; "Let your compassion come to me that I may live. ...that I may not be put to shame. If your law had not been my delight I would have perished in my affliction."
Hope = I might not see it or feel it sometimes but I hold on to it.
Verse 109; Though I constantly take my life in my hands, (suicide) I will not forget your law. (Hope)
Verse 116; Sustain me according to your promise, and I will live; do not let my hopes be dashed.
Verses 133-136; Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me. Redeem me from the oppression of men, that I may obey your precepts. Make your face shine upon your servant and teach me your decrees. Streams of tears flow from my eyes, for your law is not obeyed.
Verses 175-176; Let me live that I may praise you, and may your laws sustain me. I have strayed like a lost sheep. Seek your servant, for I have not forgotten you commands.
Prayers, hope, encouragement, direction; a couple of hours spent with God, and a bit of time talking to my pastor put me in a better place. Those things always work for me. The problem is that I don't obey. I don't apply. I get the good, I-am-loved-and-cared-about feeling and I try to hold on to that. I try to find my peace and joy in that; what feels good. But then morning came; still sleep deprived and not leaning on God I become weak again. Emotions run high, the body becomes weak, rational thinking is lost, and the conditions become perfect for Satan, again. This time I let loose in a temper tantrum; shoe smacks wall a few times, ugly words fly in a loud tone. Then bitterness, guilt, hopelessness, desires for pity; they all return.
Today I am feel more rested; sleep was more than a dream. I'm thinking more clearly, plus things are a back to normal around here. I have learned this week some things that I still need to work on to be a healthier me.
"Sometimes the strength within you is not a big fiery flame for everyone to see, It's just a tiny spark that whispers ever so softly, "Keep going. You got this!" -TS
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Friday, January 23, 2015
HEALTH
I have to be honest; I have been finding it harder and harder to make myself sit down to read God's word and pray. The desire to do so is just not there. I have been pretty regular with my challenge prayer and trying to continue with my gift list. Some days it is just hard to see the gifts. I have just been feeling blue and disconnected. It makes me wonder if depression is creeping back in or just the simple winter blues.
Health is the theme word for my church. That has become my personal theme word; health. I have been trying to work hard at a healthier me: Challenge prayer, gift list, counseling. I have future activities in place to work toward better health; Biggest Loser at Hope Crossing, and The Art of Marriage seminar on Valentine's day. I had been feeling my spirit lift but Satan must have found a weak spot and he is working hard, and I have not been leaning on God. I have been trusting in Satan's lies more than I have been trusting in God's truth. It somehow seems easier even though I know that is not true. All it does is lead you to three hour meltdowns; sleep deprivation does not help the situation, either. A friend reminded me today that God is close to those hurting. God showed me that it hurts right now BECAUSE he is at work in my life. He is at work helping me to succeed in becoming a healthier me; answer to my challenge prayer. He never fails us. He never fails me even though I doubt and fear. I have actually stopped using the word "willing" and "going to" in that challenge prayer and replaced them with want, because that is all I feel I can do right now. But, God has honored that prayer by letting that be enough and working in my life anyway. Then he showed me he has been working. He is finding ways to keep me encouraged even though I have been resisting Him.
I was reminded while preparing my Sunday School lesson for the kids Sunday what kind of soil I need to be. I have to be the good soil; the soil that is full of nutrients so the seed (God's word) can grow and grow into a strong hardy plant. The only way my soil can stay good is by sticking close to God, even when he feels distant or I feel dry; I have to keep keeping on in his word and in conversation with him. He will always honor my efforts, even when my efforts feel like just mindless motions.
Gift List:
January 16
23. Family able to spend an evening together all in one room, special moments few and far in between.
January 17
24. True, honest, all-accepting friendships.
25. Mother; self-sacrificing, doing-the-best-she-can love.
26. Sisters; special kind of relationship, there-when-you-need-them love.
27. Father; brought me into this world. Didn't know how to show his love, didn't know how to heal. I believe he loved me; he tried.
January 19
28. Silence.
29. Laundry = because we have clothes to wear.
30. Housework = because we have a house to live in.
January 20
31. New beginnings with every breath taken.
32. Color; bold, vibrant, energizing; dull, washed out, bleak and peaceful; dark, earthy, warm and inviting.
33. Water; refreshing, cleansing, relaxing, play time.
34. Memories; ugly, sad; beautiful, joy; exciting, fun; hard, strength; teaching, life-lessons learned/learning; life-giving moments.
35. Spirit-lifting, skin-warming, light-giving sun.
36. Rays of light opening gray skies.
37. His Love! (I was shoveling snow this day and I saw on the driveway, where the garbage cans once sat waiting for the garbage truck, a clear patch in the snow in the shape of a beautiful heart.
January 22
38. Listening ears.
39. Prayers from loved ones.
40. Time alone, no thoughts, no words, just being.
Friday, January 16, 2015
God-given encouragement
Gift List. Not of gifts I want but of gifts I already have. Gifts he bestows.
This writing it down - it is sort of like... unwrapping love. God gives gifts and I give thanks and I unwrap the gift given, joy" -Ann Voskamp; One Thousand Gifts.
January 10, 2015 Saturday
1, Ability to put pen to paper and let soul words flow.
2. My Van, with all it's character.
3. Husband; calm supportive, loving.
4. Daughters; beautiful, make me proud.
January 11, 2015 Sunday
5. Inspiration in a dear friend's life well lived.
6. Voice to sing praises loud.
7. Music that moves my soul.
January 12, 2015 Monday
8. Getting lost in a world seen through the eyes of another's pen.
9. Strength to shovel a way through a cold winter path.
10. Beauty in a cold gray season.
11. Sounding honk and beautiful, chaotic-organized formation of geese flying overhead.
12. Caw of a solitary crow passing by.
13. Ocean-like sound of nearby traffic; reminder I'm not alone in this world.
January 13, 2015 Tuesday
14. Burst of orange through the purples and pinks on a crisp winter morn.
15. Brilliance of sun on snow-covered tree.
16. Pleasant surprise of lower cost at the register than expected.
17. Peaceful, calming rhythm of purr from happy kitty on my lap.
January 14, 2015 Wednesday
18. Loving, open conversation between husband and wife.
19. Quiet moments to pray and think during long sleepless night.
20. Heat's protection against bitter cold.
21. Sparkles dancing across sunlit-snow.
January 15, 2015 Thursday
Kind of a low day. Tried to find the gifts of the day but just couldn't see them. The day started out with Bible reading and prayer, then got busy; cleaning church, picking up house, working on a crochet project. Then there was dinner and a church meeting. There were feelings of doubt and wondering why. It is so easy to find myself in these places; some days worse than others, this day not as bad as others.
January 16, 2015 Friday
Woke up this morning with a bit of guilt over not finding a gift to write down. Started to write in my journal and vent about some things, just like I have done many times in the past; giving God my truest deepest feelings. Thoughts come to mind that make me doubt my faith; been here before, too. Thoughts come to mind that make me, again, wonder why, wonder how. Then the Bible is opened and the reading begins. Only two chapters in Psalms read and the book is closed. One Thousand Gifts is open and it leads me to where I needed to be; back to the Bible.
Exodus 33:22-23; "When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back."
"Is that it? When It gets dark, it is only because God has tucked me in a cleft of the rock and covered me, protected, with His hand? In the pitch, I feel like I'm falling, sense the bridge giving way, God long absent. In the dark, the bridge and my world shakes, cracking dreams. But maybe this is true reality: It is in the dark that God is passing by. The bridge and our lives shake not because God has abandoned, but the exact opposite: God is passing by. God is in the tremors.
Dark is the holiest ground, the glory passing by. In the blackest, God is closest, at work, forging His perfect and right will. Though it is black and we can't see and our world seems to be free-falling and we feel utterly alone, Christ is most present to us, I-beam supporting in earthquake. Then He will remove His hand. then we will look. God reveals Himself in rearview mirrors." -Ann Voskamp.
And sometimes, maybe he gives us just a peek; lifts his hand slightly, so we can find the encouragement we need to keep on fighting for Him.
22. God-given encouragement in creative ways.
This is what keeps me believing. This is what makes me tell my doubts and fears that there is no room for you here. They push back, but this promise; the promise that; "With God we will gain the victory, and he will trample down our enemies." Psalm 108:13, this is what keeps me believing. This reminder that God is walking in front of; my guider of steps, is walking beside; my best friend, is walking behind me; my driving force, and will place me in cleft in the rock and cover me with his gentle, loving, strong and mighty hand; my protector. He surrounds me, knocking away and trampling the attack of the enemy; he is my provider. Then he lets me look back and see all that he has done for me. He lets me see how he is working in my life, even if it is only a little peek. He is my encourager.
Father, I want to do what I need to get healthy and glorify you. I know I can't do this on my own. I've tried and I've failed and I'm scared that I will fail again. I'm willing to do my part, Lord, and I'm going to faithfully trust that you are working to help me succeed. I'm learning that you want me to succeed more than I do. Help me to see your hand in this quickly and keep me encouraged as I work toward better health. In Jesus' precious name Amen.
This writing it down - it is sort of like... unwrapping love. God gives gifts and I give thanks and I unwrap the gift given, joy" -Ann Voskamp; One Thousand Gifts.
January 10, 2015 Saturday
1, Ability to put pen to paper and let soul words flow.
2. My Van, with all it's character.
3. Husband; calm supportive, loving.
4. Daughters; beautiful, make me proud.
January 11, 2015 Sunday
5. Inspiration in a dear friend's life well lived.
6. Voice to sing praises loud.
7. Music that moves my soul.
January 12, 2015 Monday
8. Getting lost in a world seen through the eyes of another's pen.
9. Strength to shovel a way through a cold winter path.
10. Beauty in a cold gray season.
11. Sounding honk and beautiful, chaotic-organized formation of geese flying overhead.
12. Caw of a solitary crow passing by.
13. Ocean-like sound of nearby traffic; reminder I'm not alone in this world.
January 13, 2015 Tuesday
14. Burst of orange through the purples and pinks on a crisp winter morn.
15. Brilliance of sun on snow-covered tree.
16. Pleasant surprise of lower cost at the register than expected.
17. Peaceful, calming rhythm of purr from happy kitty on my lap.
January 14, 2015 Wednesday
18. Loving, open conversation between husband and wife.
19. Quiet moments to pray and think during long sleepless night.
20. Heat's protection against bitter cold.
21. Sparkles dancing across sunlit-snow.
January 15, 2015 Thursday
Kind of a low day. Tried to find the gifts of the day but just couldn't see them. The day started out with Bible reading and prayer, then got busy; cleaning church, picking up house, working on a crochet project. Then there was dinner and a church meeting. There were feelings of doubt and wondering why. It is so easy to find myself in these places; some days worse than others, this day not as bad as others.
January 16, 2015 Friday
Woke up this morning with a bit of guilt over not finding a gift to write down. Started to write in my journal and vent about some things, just like I have done many times in the past; giving God my truest deepest feelings. Thoughts come to mind that make me doubt my faith; been here before, too. Thoughts come to mind that make me, again, wonder why, wonder how. Then the Bible is opened and the reading begins. Only two chapters in Psalms read and the book is closed. One Thousand Gifts is open and it leads me to where I needed to be; back to the Bible.
Exodus 33:22-23; "When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back."
"Is that it? When It gets dark, it is only because God has tucked me in a cleft of the rock and covered me, protected, with His hand? In the pitch, I feel like I'm falling, sense the bridge giving way, God long absent. In the dark, the bridge and my world shakes, cracking dreams. But maybe this is true reality: It is in the dark that God is passing by. The bridge and our lives shake not because God has abandoned, but the exact opposite: God is passing by. God is in the tremors.
Dark is the holiest ground, the glory passing by. In the blackest, God is closest, at work, forging His perfect and right will. Though it is black and we can't see and our world seems to be free-falling and we feel utterly alone, Christ is most present to us, I-beam supporting in earthquake. Then He will remove His hand. then we will look. God reveals Himself in rearview mirrors." -Ann Voskamp.
And sometimes, maybe he gives us just a peek; lifts his hand slightly, so we can find the encouragement we need to keep on fighting for Him.
22. God-given encouragement in creative ways.
This is what keeps me believing. This is what makes me tell my doubts and fears that there is no room for you here. They push back, but this promise; the promise that; "With God we will gain the victory, and he will trample down our enemies." Psalm 108:13, this is what keeps me believing. This reminder that God is walking in front of; my guider of steps, is walking beside; my best friend, is walking behind me; my driving force, and will place me in cleft in the rock and cover me with his gentle, loving, strong and mighty hand; my protector. He surrounds me, knocking away and trampling the attack of the enemy; he is my provider. Then he lets me look back and see all that he has done for me. He lets me see how he is working in my life, even if it is only a little peek. He is my encourager.
Father, I want to do what I need to get healthy and glorify you. I know I can't do this on my own. I've tried and I've failed and I'm scared that I will fail again. I'm willing to do my part, Lord, and I'm going to faithfully trust that you are working to help me succeed. I'm learning that you want me to succeed more than I do. Help me to see your hand in this quickly and keep me encouraged as I work toward better health. In Jesus' precious name Amen.
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Grace and Thanksgiving
I have been successful with my challenge so far; thank you God for your help with that. And I can say that I am noticing some changes taking place; nothing major, just subtle, hope-filled changes. I participated in a food fest this week, and I'm not able to run a marathon, stretch my body like a rubber band, or lift an impressive amount of weight, but I have been consistent with my 15 min exercise program three times a week; this week. It hasn't been an everyday thing yet but I have been reading from my Bible more, and my journaling has not been just one long vent session with God. I see these things as big accomplishments and things worthy of celebration.
I have been reading about grace and thanksgiving, not just in the Bible but in a beautifully poetic book written by Ann Voskamp; A Thousand Gifts. Thank you to my sister for introducing me to this book.
"A free and ready favor. That's grace. It is one thing to choose to take the grace offered at the cross. But to choose to live as one filling with His grace? Choosing to fill with all that He freely gives and fully live - with glory and grace and God? Could I live that - the choice to open the hands to freely receive whatever God gives? If I don't, I am still making a choice." - From the book above.
Grace is a gift from God, it requires a choice to receive that gift. We have to make that choice. We have to fully surrender to that choice. We have to believe and trust that God loves us so much that he would sacrifice his Son so that we can receive the gift of grace and a life everlasting with Him. Surrender and trust are the things I struggle with. I need to believe that I am just as worthy as everyone else.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
"Thanksgiving is the manifestation to our yes to His grace!"
"As long as thanks is possible, then joy is always possible." - A Thousand Gifts
The importance of thanksgiving. Ann also said in her book, "This is why I sat all those years in church but my soul holes had never full healed." This made me think of myself and I how I have battled with depression for so many years. I know there are causes and reasons for depression; stress, chemical imbalances, and traumatic life experiences. And I know that I have got to learn to stop fighting God so much and give him my trust. But am I thankful enough. Do I really take the time to tell God thank you for all he is and all he does. To be honest, no. When I am experiencing a high in my life, when I am having one of those moments when I am feeling really connected to Him, then yes I do. But not in the everyday. I don't always look for the things to be thankful for during the low and hard times. Ann says in her book, "Thanks is what multiplies the joy and makes any life large, and I hunger for it." I really do hunger for a "life large", for freedom and healing.
One Thousand Gifts. This is an added part to my 2015 challenge. I am going to take the idea from this book to make a "gift list. Not of gifts I want but of gifts I already have." Now I have done the exercise of making a list of the 100 things I am thankful for before as a way of helping me to focus on all that I am blessed with. It really does help to look at all of your blessing, but I never looked at them as "gifts" before. A gift is given voluntarily. A gift is given out of love; a desire to make someone smile. A gift is meant to bring joy, to let someone know they are loved and cared about. A gift is special. A gift is not just something God has blessed us with because he is God and that is what he does. No, he blesses me with things, people, opportunities, all the work he does in my life because he really, truly loves me. I am his beloved daughter. Now, I don't really know what a healthy father-daughter relationship feels like, but I am learning. So I am going to take on the "Gift List" challenge. I am hoping to find more than One Thousand Gifts.
"God gives gifts and I give thanks and I unwrap the gift given: Joy." -One Thousand Gifts
If you haven't read this book yet, I highly recommend it.
GIFT LIST:
1. The ability to put pen to paper and let soul words flow.
"This pen: This is nothing less than the driving of nails. Nails driving out my habits of discontent and driving in my habit of eucharisteo (thanksgiving). I'm hammering in nails to pound out nails, ugly nails that Satan has pierced through the world, my heart." -One Thousand Words.
I hope to one day be able to write as beautifully.
I have been reading about grace and thanksgiving, not just in the Bible but in a beautifully poetic book written by Ann Voskamp; A Thousand Gifts. Thank you to my sister for introducing me to this book.
"A free and ready favor. That's grace. It is one thing to choose to take the grace offered at the cross. But to choose to live as one filling with His grace? Choosing to fill with all that He freely gives and fully live - with glory and grace and God? Could I live that - the choice to open the hands to freely receive whatever God gives? If I don't, I am still making a choice." - From the book above.
Grace is a gift from God, it requires a choice to receive that gift. We have to make that choice. We have to fully surrender to that choice. We have to believe and trust that God loves us so much that he would sacrifice his Son so that we can receive the gift of grace and a life everlasting with Him. Surrender and trust are the things I struggle with. I need to believe that I am just as worthy as everyone else.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
"Thanksgiving is the manifestation to our yes to His grace!"
"As long as thanks is possible, then joy is always possible." - A Thousand Gifts
The importance of thanksgiving. Ann also said in her book, "This is why I sat all those years in church but my soul holes had never full healed." This made me think of myself and I how I have battled with depression for so many years. I know there are causes and reasons for depression; stress, chemical imbalances, and traumatic life experiences. And I know that I have got to learn to stop fighting God so much and give him my trust. But am I thankful enough. Do I really take the time to tell God thank you for all he is and all he does. To be honest, no. When I am experiencing a high in my life, when I am having one of those moments when I am feeling really connected to Him, then yes I do. But not in the everyday. I don't always look for the things to be thankful for during the low and hard times. Ann says in her book, "Thanks is what multiplies the joy and makes any life large, and I hunger for it." I really do hunger for a "life large", for freedom and healing.
One Thousand Gifts. This is an added part to my 2015 challenge. I am going to take the idea from this book to make a "gift list. Not of gifts I want but of gifts I already have." Now I have done the exercise of making a list of the 100 things I am thankful for before as a way of helping me to focus on all that I am blessed with. It really does help to look at all of your blessing, but I never looked at them as "gifts" before. A gift is given voluntarily. A gift is given out of love; a desire to make someone smile. A gift is meant to bring joy, to let someone know they are loved and cared about. A gift is special. A gift is not just something God has blessed us with because he is God and that is what he does. No, he blesses me with things, people, opportunities, all the work he does in my life because he really, truly loves me. I am his beloved daughter. Now, I don't really know what a healthy father-daughter relationship feels like, but I am learning. So I am going to take on the "Gift List" challenge. I am hoping to find more than One Thousand Gifts.
"God gives gifts and I give thanks and I unwrap the gift given: Joy." -One Thousand Gifts
If you haven't read this book yet, I highly recommend it.
GIFT LIST:
1. The ability to put pen to paper and let soul words flow.
"This pen: This is nothing less than the driving of nails. Nails driving out my habits of discontent and driving in my habit of eucharisteo (thanksgiving). I'm hammering in nails to pound out nails, ugly nails that Satan has pierced through the world, my heart." -One Thousand Words.
I hope to one day be able to write as beautifully.
Saturday, January 3, 2015
2015 Challenge
Father, I want to do what I need to get healthy (emotionally, physically, and spiritually) and glorify you. I know I can't do this on my own. I've tried and I've failed, and I'm scared that I will fail again. I'm willing to do my part, Lord, and I'm going to faithfully trust that you are working to help me succeed. I'm learning that you want me to succeed more than I do. Help me see your hand in this quickly, and keep me encouraged as I work toward better health. Amen.
Here is what I want for 2015:
I want to have a stronger relationship with God. It just seems like I have experienced and heard about a lot of sadness and hardship this past year. There has been a lot in 2014 that has made me sad, frustrated and angry. Don't get me wrong, there has been good things, too, it just seems like there has been an extra amount of the not-so-good. Maybe it just comes with age; I'm just getting more sensitive. I think I have been doubting God's ability. I've been wonder why, and what is the point a lot. I've actually been pulling away from God; not spending nearly enough time in God's word or in prayer with him. I want to make it a point to read from my bible, journal and pray daily. I want to learn to trust God completely. I've never been able to trust him completely, especially when it come to my own personal stuff.
I want to reach my goal weight of 160, be more physically fit and better my times at the sprint triathlon this year. I want to get control of my eating. I am an emotional eater; I have what I call food fests when I am feeling sad, or stressed.
I want to be emotionally healthier.
I want to start new relationships and I want to be the best friend, mother and wife that I can be.
Here is my challenge: I am going to pray the prayer I wrote above everyday. I started this challenge on the first. I got this prayer out of The Daniel Plan book. God hears our prayers and he never fails to answer them. I am going to hold on to that promise. This prayer is going to be a way for me to get closer to God and also be a reminder that I have some work to do while I trust God to do the rest. I know I have not blogged in a long time, but I thought that I would blog about my challenge as a way to keep me accountable and to share with you how God works in my life this year.
I invite you to take this challenge with me. Whether it falls in the category of physical, emotional or spiritual, or maybe, like me, it falls in all three categories, we all have something that we are striving for. God wants us all to be healthier in all these areas of our lives and he wants to be there for you, to help you and encourage you. He wants you to succeed. Trust God to guide you in what you need to do and then obey; he will honor it. Let me know if you have decided to take on this challenge with me and I will pray for your success.
Praying for a blessed and successful 2015 for myself and for all of you.
Here is what I want for 2015:
I want to have a stronger relationship with God. It just seems like I have experienced and heard about a lot of sadness and hardship this past year. There has been a lot in 2014 that has made me sad, frustrated and angry. Don't get me wrong, there has been good things, too, it just seems like there has been an extra amount of the not-so-good. Maybe it just comes with age; I'm just getting more sensitive. I think I have been doubting God's ability. I've been wonder why, and what is the point a lot. I've actually been pulling away from God; not spending nearly enough time in God's word or in prayer with him. I want to make it a point to read from my bible, journal and pray daily. I want to learn to trust God completely. I've never been able to trust him completely, especially when it come to my own personal stuff.
I want to reach my goal weight of 160, be more physically fit and better my times at the sprint triathlon this year. I want to get control of my eating. I am an emotional eater; I have what I call food fests when I am feeling sad, or stressed.
I want to be emotionally healthier.
I want to start new relationships and I want to be the best friend, mother and wife that I can be.
Here is my challenge: I am going to pray the prayer I wrote above everyday. I started this challenge on the first. I got this prayer out of The Daniel Plan book. God hears our prayers and he never fails to answer them. I am going to hold on to that promise. This prayer is going to be a way for me to get closer to God and also be a reminder that I have some work to do while I trust God to do the rest. I know I have not blogged in a long time, but I thought that I would blog about my challenge as a way to keep me accountable and to share with you how God works in my life this year.
I invite you to take this challenge with me. Whether it falls in the category of physical, emotional or spiritual, or maybe, like me, it falls in all three categories, we all have something that we are striving for. God wants us all to be healthier in all these areas of our lives and he wants to be there for you, to help you and encourage you. He wants you to succeed. Trust God to guide you in what you need to do and then obey; he will honor it. Let me know if you have decided to take on this challenge with me and I will pray for your success.
Praying for a blessed and successful 2015 for myself and for all of you.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)